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2017 New Year’s Resolutions
Reviewing Life Goals
How did you do with your New Year’s resolutions in 2016?
Sticking to New Year's resolutions can be hard. I mean, if you think about, it it's a goal you find challenging. If it were easy for you, you’d already be doing it, and you wouldn’t have it on a list of things you want to change.Click To TweetPersonally, I know my challenges and try to work on them regularly. But, like so many others, I did set forth with three goals for 2016.
- Work on my 3-year plan
- Weight-loss and healthy eating
- Stay organized and on track
Number one on my list, working on my 3-year plan, was always at the forefront of my day. I’m in my forties, so it is important for me to stay focused on my career and future goals. This 3-year plan encompasses a lot of things in my life, some professional and some personal. This year for my career, I wanted to branch out with more pet freelance work and speaking at pet expos, write another pet book, and work on my personal pet blog.
What I didn’t know was that during this process I would end up totally re-branding my company and the focus of my brand-Raising Your Pets Naturally with Tonya Wilhelm. This rebranding was just what I needed. However, with this, I also ended up taking my main website and 3 blogs and merging them to a new website and host. This was—and still is—a HUGE project. I’m still going over 10 years of online pet articles and reformatting, fixing links, and updating images. Then, there is the issue about SEO and getting my new website listed and linked up across the internet. That’s doing well again, but I still have improvements to make.
#1 is doing well, but like with everything I do, I don’t feel like I am where I wanted to be. Maybe my goal is too high.
Next on my list is the notorious weight-loss and healthy eating. I joined a local gym in January and hit the gym almost daily. Things were on track and I was losing some weight. Eating healthy was going okay, but not fantastic. I’m always so busy and I’m single, which makes cooking a healthy meal quite challenging. At one point I told myself, before buying something to eat, I would ask myself “would I feed it to Dexter?” Basically, that meant it needed to be fresh, not from a box or filled with junk.
My #2 goal of losing weight and healthy eating went by the wayside when number #1 kicked in with the rebranding. That felt so central to my life that I didn’t even want to spend the 60-90 minutes away from other parts of my life, like work. I mean, I ALWAYS make my time for my pets and family, so something had to give, right? Since this goal is more personal and is about me, it always gets lost and deprioritized.
My final New Year’s resolution was to stay organized and on track. Not being organized has always been funny to me, because I’m a girl who loves drawers, bins, organizational tools, etc. Everything does have a place, but the problem for me has been to get those things back to their place when I’m finished. Maybe it ties in with the second part, staying on track. For me, I have like five projects I’m working on all on my desk, on the table next to me, over there and here. Don’t get me wrong, though—I never miss a deadline, and usually finish early.
This year, I bought a new computer desk, new office chair, a few wall calendars, and a new blogging calendar. I’m even looking at one of those 32-37” professional computer monitors so that I can have two regular-sized windows open at the same time! Keeping my thoughts and tasks in place comes and goes.
The staying on track part for me is to stick with a daily task plan. But that’s always challenging in my line of work. My main source of income is seeing dog training and cat behavior clients in person or via phone/Skype. So I never know what time of day I will end up booking a session, and what time of day will be free for other work. Or an article idea pops into my head and I feel like I need to write it NOW. My goal, is to just keep my ongoing “to write” list going and when my writing day arrives, go down the list. Or if my website optimization day is here, work on that. At least that’s the goal. 😉
What does that mean for me for 2017? Like with anything, it’s about trying, and getting back up to try again when I’m not successful. We aren’t perfect. Just because I didn’t reach my 2016 goals doesn’t mean I can’t try them again for 2017.
My goal this year is to continue on my path. The first thing I will do is to pull out my trusty calendar, and work on scheduling my daily tasks and goals so I can stick to the plan easier. When something actually makes my planner, I am more likely to follow through.
I plan on writing another book this year, this one about kids and dogs, geared toward kids. I am also thinking about writing a cookbook for busy people who are not cooks! That’s me. My theory is if I make healthy eating part of my career (or my now 2-year plan), I will look at it as a necessity to eat better and cook for myself, instead of something to put off to the side.
It was brought to my attention in a blogger group that we must take time for ourselves. I sort of was looking at this part as #2, but if #2 still has a business angle, am I really putting work aside to JUST BE? Even when I’m in bed trying to unwind from the day, I am looking at my phone on how to improve x. So, I think I will add a #4 to my resolution list, to disconnect from anything work related. This may actually be my hardest challenge for the year!
At least those are my 2017 goals for now.
What about you? Do you struggle with New Year’s resolutions?
Tell me in the comments.
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Why Does My Dog Shut Down During Training Sessions?What does it mean when a dog shuts down during training?Why does my dog not listen to me during training?How can I tell the difference between a calm dog and a shut down dog?What should I do if my dog is shutting down during training?What should I do if my dog gets frustrated during training?How do I rebuild engagement when training feels stuck?Why does training progress slow down even when you’re doing everything right?How can I help my dog long term and help prevent shut down?How can understanding your dog’s feelings change your training journey
Why Does My Dog Shut Down During Training Sessions?
If your dog gets frustrated, disengages, or seems to mentally check out during training, this is often a sign of a dog that is shut down rather than stubbornness or lack of motivation. Many dog parents are unknowingly training a shut down dog and feel confused because their dog still “complies” but the connection and progress are gone.
When a dog starts to shut down during training, it doesn’t happen all at once. Most of the time, it’s a gradual change that’s easy to miss until your dog just isn’t as eager as he used to be. At first, your dog may hesitate, offer fewer behaviors, or seem less enthusiastic. Over time, engagement drops, learning plateaus, and sessions start to feel frustrating for both of you. Because the dog is not showing obvious stress signals, it can be hard to recognize what is really happening.
If you’ve heard the term “dog shutdown” or noticed your own dog shut down during training, you’re not alone. Many dog parents use both phrases to describe those moments when a dog just checks out, stops listening, or seems to mentally disappear during a session.
What does it mean when a dog shuts down during training?
A dog that shuts down during training usually starts to act distracted or distant. You might notice he stops looking at you, turns his head away, or pays more attention to the floor or something across the room. Some dogs will sniff, scratch, or just seem uninterested in what you’re doing together. When you call his name, he might not respond or will avoid making eye contact. Some won’t take treats at all. It’s easy to miss these subtle signs because your dog isn’t causing trouble, he’s just not really present. When you see this, it’s often your dog’s way of saying he’s overwhelmed, confused, or simply not comfortable at that moment, and he’s tuning out to cope.
Why does my dog not listen to me during training?
It can be confusing and discouraging when your dog suddenly does not listen to you or ignores cues he’s known for ages or acts like all his training has disappeared. Maybe he stops coming when called, ignores your request to sit, or just turns away when you ask for something simple. This leads many dog parents to wonder if they’re doing something wrong or if their dog is being stubborn. In reality, most dogs who stop listening during training aren’t trying to be difficult. They’re often feeling lost, frustrated, or just not sure what to do next.
A dog who tunes out during training will usually avoid eye contact, wander off, or freeze and wait for the session to end. Sometimes he’ll refuse treats or take them without much interest. These are all signals that your dog is struggling with the session emotionally. If this happens, the best thing you can do is pause, let your dog take a break, and focus on making things relaxed and positive again. Keeping sessions short, clear, and full of encouragement helps bring back his confidence and eagerness to work with you.
How can I tell the difference between a calm dog and a shut down dog?
A calm dog feels safe, connected, and able to process what’s happening around him. When a dog is truly calm, his body is relaxed and loose, his eyes are soft, and he’s able to check in with you or explore his environment with quiet curiosity. He might pause and settle, but he’s still present and aware, able to respond to gentle cues or interact with you if invited. Even when he makes a mistake, a calm dog can bounce back and try again.
A shut down dog, on the other hand, is in a very different emotional place. This isn’t just distraction or mild disinterest. A shut down dog often looks blank, distant, or frozen. You may notice a glassy look in his eyes or a fixed stare into space. He may move in a slow, robotic way, or sometimes not move at all. He doesn’t check in, interact, or seek comfort. He doesn’t try new things or respond to familiar cues, even with encouragement. Sometimes he ignores treats completely, or he takes them in a mechanical way without showing any real interest. You might notice he seems numb to what’s happening around him, just waiting for the session to be over. It’s not distraction; it’s emotional withdrawal.
If you’re working with your dog and you see that he’s still, unresponsive, and completely checked out, it’s time to stop and help him feel safe again. True shut down is a dog’s way of coping when everything feels overwhelming or inescapable. Unlike a calm dog, he’s not processing or learning, he’s simply enduring.
If you notice your dog looking quiet but no longer engaging, and especially if you’ve lost the connection you once had, it’s important to consider whether he’s truly calm or if he’s shutting down. Supporting a shut down dog starts with recognizing these deeper signs and responding with patience, compassion, and a focus on rebuilding trust and comfort.
What should I do if my dog is shutting down during training?
If your dog is shutting down during training, it’s time to pivot. At this moment, the kindest thing you can do is stop training right away. Give your dog space and let him decompress without any pressure from you. Don’t coax or try to cheerlead him back into the session. Just be there for him, calmly and quietly, until he’s ready to reconnect. The next time you train, keep things gentle and short, and focus on rebuilding trust with simple, positive experiences. Over time, these moments of safety help your dog feel comfortable and confident enough to learn again.
What should I do if my dog gets frustrated during training?
Frustration during training looks very different from shut down. A frustrated dog usually gets wiggly or vocal, maybe barking, whining, or bouncing around because he wants to get it right but can’t quite figure out what you’re looking for. If you notice this energy from your dog, it’s a good idea to pause and make things easier. Go back to something simple your dog enjoys, break the exercise into smaller steps, and celebrate even the smallest effort. Sometimes all your dog needs is a quick win and a little encouragement to get back on track. Keeping your tone upbeat, taking play breaks, and letting your dog enjoy a little success are all ways to help ease frustration and bring back the joy in training.
How do I rebuild engagement when training feels stuck?
When your dog has checked out in a session, it’s important to make the next training experience feel safe and positive for both of you. Start by giving your dog the freedom to choose whether or not to participate. If he walks away or seems unsure, let him have that space. When he decides to come back and join in, calmly acknowledge him with gentle praise or a favorite reward. This helps your dog learn that training is something he can opt into, not something he’s forced to do.
Think about what your dog truly enjoys. Sometimes food treats aren’t enough on their own. Many dogs love a chance to sniff, move around, play a dog game, or simply enjoy a quiet moment with you. Mixing up rewards and letting your dog experience a variety of positive outcomes can reignite his interest and make training feel more like a partnership again.
Remember, progress happens when both of you feel relaxed and connected. If you notice yourself getting frustrated, it’s okay to pause and regroup. Your dog can sense your energy, and a calm, patient approach from you helps him feel safe enough to try again. The goal is to rebuild trust and engagement, one small, enjoyable step at a time.
Why does training progress slow down even when you’re doing everything right?
Every dog parent runs into times when progress just seems to stall, even when you’re using positive, gentle methods and showing up for your dog. Plateaus in training are a normal part of the process and they happen to everyone, no matter how much love and care goes into each session. It’s not a sign that you’re doing anything wrong.
Often, these slowdowns simply mean your dog needs a little extra emotional support or a change of pace. Learning can stop when a dog is tired, overwhelmed, or just needs things to be a bit simpler for a while. These moments are a reminder to slow down, reconnect, and maybe make training sessions shorter or easier. Sometimes, just spending time together without any agenda is what gets things moving forward again. Progress will pick up when your dog feels ready, and taking a step back for connection often helps more than trying something new or more advanced.
How can I help my dog long term and help prevent shut down?
The best way to help your dog feel good about training over time is to focus on your relationship and how your dog feels, not just what he accomplishes. Pay attention to the small signals your dog gives you during each session. If he starts to turn away, seems less interested, or slows down, that is your cue to pause and check in with him. Letting your sessions be flexible makes it easier to adjust your plan based on your dog’s needs that day.
Celebrate every small win. Notice what your dog really enjoys and bring more of those moments into your training. Progress goes up and down for everyone, and some days are just slower than others. That is completely normal.
If your dog continues to shut down, even after making things easier and focusing on connection, it may help to look at his overall wellbeing. Sometimes pain, discomfort, or changes at home can affect how your dog feels during training. Dogs are sensitive to both physical and emotional stress, and everything is connected. The most important thing is to support your dog as a whole, making sure he feels safe, comfortable, and ready to learn when he is able.
If your dog is still shutting down or you feel stuck, you don’t have to figure it out alone. My private sessions are tailored to help you and your dog work through these challenges together. If you’d like one-on-one support and a plan just for your family, you can learn more or reach out here: https://raisingyourpetsnaturally.com/global-dog-training/onlinedogtraining
How can understanding your dog’s feelings change your training journey
When you recognize what a shut down dog really looks like, dog training stops feeling confusing or frustrating. It becomes a real bonding opportunity between you and your dog, instead of just working through a list of cues. A dog who shuts down is not stubborn or difficult. He is simply telling you, in the only way he can, that he needs things to feel safer and more supportive.
When you listen to those signals and adjust your approach, trust starts to rebuild and learning can return. Slowing down and helping your dog feel comfortable helps your dog rebuild his confidence. Training is not just about getting your dog to perform behaviors. It is about building a relationship where your dog feels safe enough to try and knows you are there for him along the way.
💌 Sign up for my weekly newsletter and we’ll navigate training, care, and confidence-building together. Join today and get tips, encouragement, and support to help you and your dog enjoy the life you’re creating together.
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Tonya WilhelmHi, I’m Tonya Wilhelm—a positive dog trainer, holistic pet care educator, and proud dog mom. With nearly 30 years of experience helping families raise confident, well-mannered dogs, I focus on trust-based training, enrichment, and natural wellness. I’m also a published author and content creator who shares effective, proactive ways to prevent behavior problems and help dogs thrive. You’ll often hear about my angel dogs Dexter and Stewart, who continue to inspire my work every day.
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Even in snow, some ticks stick around.
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Do Ticks Live in the Winter?Are Ticks Active in Winter?When Are Ticks Out in the Winter?Where Are Ticks Found During Cold Months?Dog Ticks and Tick-Borne Disease: The Winter RiskTick On Dog Symptoms: What to Watch ForSigns of Tick Borne DiseaseNatural Winter Tick Prevention for DogsDaily Prevention Strategies for Tick PreventionWhere Ticks Are Found: Adjust Your Walking RoutesNatural Tick Repellents That WorkThe Reality of Winter Tick Prevention
Do Ticks Live in the Winter?
It’s a crisp December morning, and you’re bundled up for a winter walk with your dog. The ground is frozen, maybe there’s even snow on the ground. Surely, you think, there’s no need to worry about ticks in this weather, right?
I wish I could tell you that’s true. But here’s the reality that might surprise you. Ticks don’t simply disappear when temperatures drop. And that misconception can leave our dogs vulnerable to tick-borne diseases year-round.
Let me share what I’ve learned about winter tick activity and, more importantly, how to keep our dogs safe naturally throughout the colder months.
Are Ticks Active in Winter?
The short answer? Yes, but it’s complicated. Most people assume ticks die off in winter or at least become dormant. That would be convenient, wouldn’t it? Unfortunately, ticks are remarkably resilient creatures. Different tick species have different winter survival strategies, and some remain surprisingly active even in cold weather.
When temperatures consistently drop below freezing, most tick species do become less active. But, and this is the crucial part, they don’t die. They enter a state called diapause, which is similar to hibernation. They’re just waiting for the right conditions to become active again.
When Are Ticks Out in the Winter?
The blacklegged tick (also called the deer tick), which carries Lyme disease, can actually remain active whenever temperatures rise above 35°F. Research shows that even brief winter warm spells can trigger tick activity. Think about those unseasonably warm winter days we’ve been seeing more frequently. Your dog is at risk during those periods.
Some tick species are specifically adapted to cold weather. The winter tick, for instance, is most active during fall and winter months, hence its name. While this species primarily targets larger mammals like deer and moose, studies show these ticks can occasionally attach to dogs who venture into wooded areas.
So when someone asks, “Are there ticks in the winter?” The honest answer is, absolutely. They may not be as abundant as during peak season (spring through fall), but they’re definitely present and potentially dangerous.
Where Are Ticks Found During Cold Months?
Understanding where ticks hide in winter helps us protect our dogs more effectively. Ticks are clever about finding warm spots. They don’t need much, just enough protection from extreme cold to survive. Here’s where ticks typically like to live during winter.
Leaf litter is the tick’s favorite spot during winter. That layer of decomposing leaves on the forest floor? It acts like an insulating blanket, keeping temperatures several degrees warmer than the air. The insulation provided by leaf litter can maintain temperatures conducive to tick survival even when surface conditions are freezing.
Brush piles and wood piles near your home create perfect tick refuges. These structures trap warmth and provide protection from wind.
Areas near foundations and stone walls also attract ticks in winter because these structures absorb and radiate heat. That sunny spot against your house where snow melts first? Ticks know about it too.
Dog Ticks and Tick-Borne Disease: The Winter Risk
Just because tick activity decreases in winter doesn’t mean the risk of tick-borne disease disappears. The blacklegged tick (deer tick) is our primary concern because it transmits Lyme disease. Health data shows this species remains a significant threat throughout winter months. But Lyme disease isn’t the only concern. These same ticks can transmit:
Anaplasmosis
Babesiosis
Powassan virus
The brown dog tick, another species that can survive indoors year-round, transmits Rocky Mountain spotted fever and other diseases. If your dog brings one of these ticks inside during winter, it can establish an infestation in your home because these ticks can complete their entire life cycle indoors.
Tick On Dog Symptoms: What to Watch For
Here’s some encouraging news. Finding a tick on your dog doesn’t automatically mean disease transmission has occurred. The timing of removal matters tremendously.
The blacklegged tick that carries Lyme disease is surprisingly slow at transmitting the bacteria to your dog. Research shows it typically takes about eight hours before transmission even begins, and the risk remains very low if you remove the tick within 24 hours of attachment. This gives you a real window of opportunity to prevent infection.
This is exactly why daily tick checks are so powerful. You’re not just finding ticks, you’re catching them before they have time to transmit disease. Every evening when you run your hands over your dog’s body, you’re actively preventing tick-borne illness. That simple routine of checking your dog after outdoor time? It’s honestly one of the most effective prevention strategies available, and it doesn’t require any chemicals or medications.
Immediate removal is your best defense. The moment you find a tick, remove it properly. Use a tick removal tool or tweezers. Grasp the tick as close to the skin as you can. Pull upward with steady, even pressure. It is important that you do not twist or jerk the tick. After successfully removing the tick, clean the bite area and your hands with rubbing alcohol. To dispose of the tick, put it in rubbing alcohol or place it in a sealed bag/container.
After safely removing a tick, talk with your dog’s veterinarian about your dog’s lifestyle and any potential risk factors for tick exposure. Consulting your veterinarian allows for a discussion on what to do next.
Signs of Tick Borne Disease
Knowing the signs of tick-borne disease is crucial, especially since winter tick encounters might catch you off guard. The tricky part? Symptoms can develop gradually and might not appear for weeks after the initial bite.
In the early stages, you might notice your dog seems a bit “off.” They may be more lethargic than usual, showing less interest in their usual activities or playtime. Many dogs develop a decreased appetite, they might sniff their food and walk away, or eat only part of their meal. Fever often accompanies these early signs, though it can be subtle enough that you don’t notice unless you’re specifically checking their temperature.
Joint pain and lameness are particularly common with Lyme disease. Your dog might start favoring one leg, then seem fine, then favor a different leg days later. This “shifting leg lameness” is a classic sign that shouldn’t be ignored. You might also notice your dog hesitating before jumping into the car or showing reluctance to climb stairs they normally bound up without a second thought.
If tick-borne disease progresses without treatment, more serious symptoms can develop. Swollen lymph nodes become noticeable, especially around the neck and behind the knees. Some dogs develop kidney problems, particularly with Lyme disease, which might show up as increased thirst, increased urination, or decreased appetite. Neurological issues can emerge in severe cases, including seizures or changes in behavior. Chronic joint disease can set in if the initial infection isn’t properly addressed, leading to ongoing pain and mobility issues that significantly impact your dog’s quality of life.
Some dogs can test positive for tick-borne diseases without showing obvious symptoms initially. Your dog might seem perfectly fine while the disease quietly establishes itself in their system. This is exactly why year-round natural tick prevention matters so much, even in winter when we tend to drop our guard.
Natural Winter Tick Prevention for Dogs
Now let me share what really works for keeping our dogs safe from ticks during winter months. As you know from my approach to dog care, I focus on natural solutions that support overall health rather than relying on chemical treatments that can have serious side effects.
Daily Prevention Strategies for Tick Prevention
Tick checks become even more important in winter because we tend to let our guard down. After every walk, run your hands thoroughly over your dog’s body, paying special attention to:
Around the ears and inside ear flaps
Under the collar
Between the toes
Around the tail base
In the armpits and groin area
Along the belly
These warm, protected areas are where ticks prefer to attach. In winter, when your dog may have a thicker coat, you’ll need to be extra diligent.
Where Ticks Are Found: Adjust Your Walking Routes
I’ve learned to be strategic about winter walks. When possible, stick to cleared paths and avoid:
Heavy brush and unmowed areas
Leaf litter accumulations
The edges of wooded areas
Tall grass, even dried winter grass
I know this can be challenging because these are often the most interesting places for our dogs to explore. But during those warmer winter days when ticks are most active, a walk through your neighborhood might be safer than a hike through the woods. If not, plan for a bath after your adventure. This is a great way to remove ticks! Just ask Stewart.
Natural Tick Repellents That Work
Several natural options can help repel ticks without exposing your dog to harsh chemicals. Essential oil blends can be effective when properly diluted. I personally use a combination of cedarwood, geranium, lavender, citronella and peppermint.
Grab my free natural tick and flea prevention guide! It’s full of DIY recipes and so much more. Download today!
The Reality of Winter Tick Prevention
Year-round tick prevention isn’t just a pharmaceutical company marketing scheme. The research is clear, ticks remain a genuine threat during winter months, especially with our changing climate patterns.
But that doesn’t mean you need to resort to chemical spot-on treatments or oral medications that can have serious side effects. It means you need to be vigilant and consistent with natural prevention methods.
Natural tick prevention requires more effort than just applying a chemical treatment once a month. You need to:
Check your dog after every outdoor adventure
Maintain your prevention routine consistently
Stay aware of conditions that increase tick risk
Keep your dog’s immune system strong through diet and lifestyle
Is it worth it? Absolutely. You’re protecting your dog from both ticks and the potential side effects of harsh chemicals. Remember, those warm winter days are when you need to be most vigilant. If temperatures rise above freezing, assume ticks are active.
https://www.caryinstitute.org/news-insights/feature/ticks-winter-your-questions-answered
https://digitalcommons.library.umaine.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=4394&context=etd
https://ouci.dntb.gov.ua/en/works/4NQKWye7/
https://www.healthvermont.gov/sites/default/files/documents/pdf/ENV_CH_TickborneDiseasesReport.pdf
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/38011672/
Do you want more natural support? Join us on Patreon for exclusive dog-friendly recipes, training tips, and holistic care guidance you won’t find anywhere else. https://www.patreon.com/c/raisingyourpetsnaturally
💌 Sign up for my weekly newsletter and we’ll navigate training, care, and confidence-building together. Join today and get tips, encouragement, and support to help you and your dog enjoy the life you’re creating together.
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Tonya WilhelmHi, I’m Tonya Wilhelm—a positive dog trainer, holistic pet care educator, and proud dog mom. With nearly 30 years of experience helping families raise confident, well-mannered dogs, I focus on trust-based training, enrichment, and natural wellness. I’m also a published author and content creator who shares effective, proactive ways to prevent behavior problems and help dogs thrive. You’ll often hear about my angel dogs Dexter and Stewart, who continue to inspire my work every day.
raisingyourpetsnaturally.com [...]
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TweetPinShareShareRedditShareFlipYumHow to Calm a Dog Down Instantly
A dog who struggles to settle at home can make even the calmest household feel hectic. Maybe your dog paces, whines, jumps up, steals attention, or simply cannot stop moving. You may be wondering why your dog is so hyper or why they can relax one minute and explode with energy the next. I want you to know this is extremely common, and it does not mean your dog is stubborn or untrained. A dog who cannot settle is a dog who needs more support, and routine so their body and mind can feel safe enough to slow down.
Before we even think about teaching a settle cue or using a dog settle mat, we must first meet the dog’s emotional, physical, and mental needs. If you’re wondering how to calm a dog down instantly, it actually takes training first! Yup, good ‘ol training. I will walk you through why this matters and exactly how to help your dog find calmness in natural, positive ways.
Why is my dog so hyper
Many dogs look hyper because they are stuck in a state of unmet needs and growing tension. Hyperactivity is not a personality flaw. It is communication. A dog becomes hyper when they do not have enough outlets throughout the day for their mind and body. The energy builds, the frustration builds, and eventually it spills out as barking, bouncing, whining, spinning, grabbing clothes, chewing furniture, and demanding attention.
A dog often feels hyper when:
Their day lacks predictable bonding
Their enrichment needs are not met
They have not had meaningful movement or sniffing
They are unsure what to do with themselves
Their training has been inconsistent
They hold stress and cannot release it on their own
This is why hyper dogs cannot simply be “told” to relax. They need guidance that supports their whole nervous system before calmness is even possible.
What a dog needs BEFORE they can ever settle
Most blogs jump straight to settle exercises, but this part matters just as much. If you tried settle work before and it did not stick, this may be why. Settling comes after a well rounded day, not before it. Here is what helps a dog ease into calmness.
Daily bonding and emotional connection
A dog settles more easily when they feel strongly connected to their person. This does not require hours of attention. Even a few minutes of brushing, gentle petting, quiet talking, or sitting on the floor together creates security. When a dog feels safe in their relationship, they do not stay in a heightened state waiting for reassurance.
When I worked with Stewart and with my sweet Angel Dexter, our bonding time was always one of the most powerful tools in helping them feel grounded and connected. It’s a step not to be overlooked.
Meaningful enrichment that satisfies the dog’s mind
Enrichment is not simply entertainment. It is emotional regulation. Dogs who sniff, shred, explore textures, solve puzzles, and chew appropriately are more relaxed because these activities complete cycles in the brain. They release stress, improve confidence, and give your dog a sense of accomplishment.
A fulfilled mind is a calmer mind. Without enrichment, a dog will seek stimulation in less desirable ways.
If you want more enrichment ideas to help your dog relax more easily, my free enrichment guide offers simple activities and a weekly tracker. 📥 https://landing.mailerlite.com/webforms/landing/n3u4b3
Short positive dog training sessions that help your dog understand what to do
Short and positive dog training sessions sprinkled throughout the day help your dog understand what to do in everyday situations. When dogs recognize simple cues, they stop guessing and start responding with more confidence. This change in mindset is especially helpful for overwhelmed or hyper dogs. Instead of feeling unsure or pressured, they think, “Oh, I know this,” and that gentle moment of understanding helps their mind settle.
These sessions can be very simple. They do not need to look like a formal training class. I often weave them into real life. A fun hand target before opening the door, a gentle name game check in when they look unsure can make a big difference. These tiny moments give your dog direction and help them feel more connected to you.
Each time your dog succeeds, their confidence grows. A confident dog carries less tension in their body and does not brace for the next surprise. They understand how to communicate with you and trust that their choices matter. This emotional steadiness helps a dog move from quick, impulsive reactions into a thinking, not reacting dog.
Short and fun dog training sessions also prevent overwhelm. Dogs learn best when dog training feels light and rewarding. A few seconds of focus, a sprinkle of treats, and a sincere “good job” can change your dog’s entire mindset and make it easier for them to relax later in the day. These small moments become the building blocks of calm behavior and support everything that comes next in your settling routine.
If you are feeling unsure about how to weave these small training moments into your day, you don’t have to do it alone. So many dog parents tell me they want to help their dog settle, but they do not know where to start or how to stay consistent. That is exactly why I created my Manners, Life Skills and Foundation Training Course.
Inside the course I guide you lesson by lesson, showing you exactly how to teach the foundation cues that help your dog feel confident, connected, and ready to relax at home. You and your dog learn together, without confusion, and without feeling overwhelmed. If you are wishing for a calmer home and a clearer path forward, I would love to walk you through it. Join me today!
Movement and sniffing walks that relax your dog’s mind and body
Movement is important for every dog, but movement by itself is not always enough to help a dog settle. In fact, a fast or rushed walk can ramp up arousal, especially for dogs who are already feeling overwhelmed or hyper. What truly relaxes a dog’s nervous system is the chance to slow down and explore the world with their nose. I always think, turtle, when walking a dog.
Sniffing is one of the most natural ways for a dog to regulate their emotions. When a dog sniffs, their breathing changes and their entire body shifts into a calmer rhythm. They gather information about their environment, sort through scents, and process the world in a way that helps them feel more grounded. Their muscles loosen, their posture softens, and their thoughts settle, and they move through the world with more ease. This gentle decompression is something a quick walk simply cannot offer.
A sniffy walk does not need to be long or complicated. It can be a short stroll where your dog meanders, pauses, and follows interesting scents. Allowing them to choose the pace and direction at times gives them a sense of control and satisfaction, which also lowers stress. These simple moments of exploration meet emotional needs that often go unnoticed.
When dogs return from a walk where they have been allowed to sniff, explore, and move at a comfortable pace, they come home in a very different mood. Their nervous system has released tension, their mind feels more settled, and they are much more prepared to relax. A sniff focused walk is one of the most powerful tools you can use when teaching a dog to settle at home.
How to help a dog who is overwhelmed or overstimulated
When a dog becomes overwhelmed or overstimulated, their body is taking in more noise, movement, excitement, or emotion than they can process. This is often when a dog parent feels lost because nothing seems to help. The dog is not choosing the behavior. Their system is simply overloaded, and they need a way to slow everything down.
1. Pause and lower the energy in the room
Stop talking for a moment and stand still. Take a soft breath and move more slowly. Your dog watches your body language closely. When you soften, your dog starts to soften too.
2. Create a brief quiet break
If possible, step with your dog into a slightly calmer space. This could be another room, a hallway, or even just a corner away from the action. You are not removing them as a punishment. You are giving their senses a chance to settle.
3. Offer an activity that naturally slows the body
A small sniffing scatter game
A gentle licking mat
A safe natural chew
A few pieces of food hidden for them to find
A gentle massage
Sniffing, licking, and chewing all help lower arousal. These activities slow the breathing, release tension in the muscles, and help your dog shift from frantic energy into a more thoughtful state.
4. Keep your tone and movements soft
Move slowly and speak quietly. A rushed tone or quick movements can keep a dog’s body wound up. A steady presence tells your dog the moment is safe and they do not need to stay on high alert.
5. Give it a minute
Dogs do not flip from overwhelmed to relaxed right away. But when you give them a quiet space, a calming activity, and your gentle presence, their nervous system begins to settle. Once their breathing slows and their body softens, they are much more able to rest or return to the next part of their day.
This approach is not about controlling your dog. You are giving them a way out of the overload so their body can ease up. When their world feels less intense, they can respond instead of react, and the rest of their day becomes much easier.
How do I help my dog go from active time to rest time before settle training
Most dogs cannot go from high energy to resting mode without a gentle transition. Their body needs time to shift gears, and it helps when the steps feel predictable. A simple routine before settle training can make the process easier and much more enjoyable for both you and your dog.
Start with something short and familiar, such as a little one minute dog training game. These tiny moments bring your dog out of that frantic state and into a mindset where they can follow your guidance. Once your dog engages with you, offer something that naturally slows the body. A sniffing scatter game, a gentle licking mat, or a safe natural chew helps your dog release tension and your dog can start to relax.
Your presence also matters. Slower movement, softer talking, and a relaxed posture give your dog the reassurance they need. When the energy in the room relaxes, your dog feels it. This combination of light activity followed by a soothing enrichment moment tells your dog’s body, “We are easing into a quieter part of the day.”
Once the transition takes place, your dog is ready for settle work.
How to teach a dog to settle at home
When your dog has had bonding time, enrichment, movement, and a gentle transition routine, they are ready to learn how to settle on cue. Teaching a dog to settle is not about forcing stillness. It is about helping them feel safe enough in their body to let go of extra tension.
Begin by choosing one consistent relaxation spot such as a dog settle mat or comfortable bed. Use this spot often so it becomes a familiar place your dog associates with ease. The mat itself becomes information. When your dog sees it, they begin to understand what comes next.
Guide your dog to the mat with a simple cue, such as “mat”. Gently lure them to their mat with a treat. Ask them for a down behavior. As your dog settles onto the mat, start noticing little signs that their body is loosening. A lowered hip, a quiet sigh, a soft blink, or slower breathing are all worth acknowledging. Reward those steps with a treat and gentle praise.
Move at your dog’s pace and keep the atmosphere light. The goal is not for your dog to hold a perfect position. The goal is for them to feel comfortable enough to let their body rest. Don’t ask them to stay, give them the freedom of choice. But, make that mat valuable for them. When this process feels pleasant and predictable, your dog learns that settling is a rewarding choice they can make throughout the day. Reward it when you see it.
How do I help my dog settle throughout the entire day
A dog’s ability to settle develops throughout the entire day. Dogs feel more at ease when they have a mix of connection, movement, enrichment, training, and quiet breaks. Quiet time lets their body rest between activities. This balance helps their body release tension instead of carrying it from morning to night.
None of this needs to be complicated. Small, thoughtful moments create a day that feels easier for your dog to handle. When their needs are met in little ways, settling becomes a natural response to a well rounded routine.
A dog who feels understood throughout the day finds it much easier to relax when the moment invites it.
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Tonya WilhelmHi, I’m Tonya Wilhelm—a positive dog trainer, holistic pet care educator, and proud dog mom. With nearly 30 years of experience helping families raise confident, well-mannered dogs, I focus on trust-based training, enrichment, and natural wellness. I’m also a published author and content creator who shares effective, proactive ways to prevent behavior problems and help dogs thrive. You’ll often hear about my angel dogs Dexter and Stewart, who continue to inspire my work every day.
raisingyourpetsnaturally.com [...]
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TweetPinShareShareRedditShareFlipYumHow to Stay Consistent With Dog Training
Most dog parents struggle with staying consistent, especially when life is busy. If you’ve been wondering how to stay consistent with dog training or why your dog seems to “forget” their cues outside or around distractions, you’re not alone. Consistency is what makes dog training stick, and it’s the main reason behaviors either grow stronger or fall apart. Let’s break down what dog training consistency really looks like and how you can make it work even on your busiest days.
Dog Training Challenges
Here’s something I hear constantly from dog parents: “My dog sits perfectly in the living room, but the second we step outside, it’s like they’ve never learned a thing!” Or maybe you’re nodding along because your pup listens great one day and seems to forget everything the next.
Does this sound familiar? And here’s what I want you to know, this isn’t about your dog being stubborn or you being a bad dog parent. This is about training habits, repetition, and the moments that get overlooked. Dogs learn through patterns, and the more consistent we are, the faster their behavior strengthens.
Dogs don’t know there’s a difference between “training time” and “regular life.” To them, it’s all learning time. Every interaction, every walk, every time you come home, they’re learning. The good habits and the bad habits. So let’s talk about how to make that work in your favor.
Why Consistency Matters in Dog Training
Dogs repeat what works for them. If a behavior pays off only sometimes, your dog learns inconsistency instead of clarity. Reliable habits come from clear repetition, predictable rewards, and patterns they can count on.
Your Habits Shape Your Dog’s Habits
If you want your dog to develop solid habits you like, you’ve got to get consistent with yours first. I know that sounds simple, but trust me, it’s trickier than you might think. But, super important.
Pop healthy, valuable dog treats in your pocket throughout the day. You want to be ready to catch those good moments right when they happen. Your dog sits calmly while you tie your shoes? Treat. They wait patiently at the door instead of bolting through? Treat. They’re chewing their bone instead of your couch cushion? You better believe that deserves a treat.
Don’t wait for a formal training session. Those quiet, everyday moments are where real learning happens. The more you reward the behaviors you love, the more your dog will offer them. It’s that straightforward.
Dog Training Tips for Busy People: How to Train Your Dog During Daily Routines
If you’ve been searching for dog training tips for busy people or ways to fit dog training practice into a normal routine, this approach makes dog training realistic and doable. You don’t need long training sessions or big blocks of time. You just need simple practice moments woven into the day you already have.
Training happens during real life. When you’re tying your shoes, walking to the mailbox, preparing meals, getting ready for work, or relaxing in the evening, your dog is learning from every interaction. These moments give you dozens of opportunities to practice cues, reinforce good choices, and build habits without setting aside lots of training time.
Think of it as capturing the behavior you want whenever it naturally appears. Reward your dog for a good choice instead of waiting for a formal sit, or ask for one easy cue before opening a door. These small repetitions help your dog connect the training to the places where you actually need the behavior.
Short bursts of practice work even better than long sessions. Five minutes a few times a day is plenty. While you wait for your coffee to brew, practice a sit or name response. During TV commercials, work on a few foundation skills. When you fold laundry, ask your dog for a down-stay nearby.
On walks, keep treats handy so you can reward moments you want to see more of. Quietly watching a squirrel, walking nicely past another dog, or checking in with you instead of pulling all deserve recognition. When company arrives, have a quick plan ready by keeping your dog on leash and guiding them through a polite greeting.
These tiny, consistent moments build the strongest habits because they happen in the same environments where you need the behavior to stick.
Management: The Secret Behind Reliable Training
If you’re struggling with dog training consistency, the first question to ask yourself is: “Is my dog rehearsing the behavior I don’t want?” Management stops unwanted habits from getting practiced.
Let me share something that changed everything for my clients. Management isn’t about controlling your dog; it’s about setting them up to win. When you prevent mistakes before they happen, you’re actually making training so much easier on both of you.
Think about it this way, every time your dog rehearses a behavior (good or bad), they’re getting better at it. So if your dog practices jumping on guests five times a day, guess what they’re going to get really good at? Jumping on guests.
Here’s how to flip that around in your favor.
Baby gates keep your pup out of rooms where they might find trouble. They can’t eat the cat food if they can’t get to the cat food.
Crates and exercise pens give your dog a safe spot when you need to focus on something else. No guilt here, dogs actually love having their own cozy space.
Harnesses and leashes inside the house let you gently guide your dog through new situations. Set up a cozy dog bed in view of the kitchen where you can see them while you cook. Hook your pup to their harness and leash, give them a healthy dog chew, and suddenly counter surfing isn’t even an option. They’re learning to relax near you instead of practicing bad habits.
Puppy-proofing saves everyone’s sanity. Put away the shoes, remote controls, and anything else your dog shouldn’t have. If they can’t reach it, they can’t destroy it.
Exercise and enrichment matter more than most people realize. A tired dog with a full brain is a well-behaved dog. Daily walks, play sessions, and food puzzles should be non-negotiable.
Safe chew options give your dog something appropriate to gnaw on. Stuffed treat toys, bully sticks, or raw bones (check my resources for safe options) keep them occupied and happy.
The best part? Good management reduces your stress and your dog’s confusion. Win-win.
Dog Won’t Listen Around Distractions? How to Help Your Dog Focus Outside
If your dog won’t listen around distractions, it’s not stubbornness. It’s a generalization issue. Dogs don’t automatically understand that a cue means the same thing everywhere.
Here’s where a lot of dog parents get stuck. Your dog might sit beautifully in the kitchen but act like they’ve never heard the word when you’re at the park. That’s not your dog being difficult. That’s just how dog brains work. They don’t automatically generalize behaviors to new environments.
You’ve got to practice each skill in multiple places, situations and distractions before your dog truly “knows” it.
Start in your living room. Once your pup is reliable there, move to the bedroom. Then the backyard. Then the front porch. Then the driveway. Then around the block. You get the idea.
When your dog struggles in a new location, make it easier. Fewer distractions, higher-value rewards, shorter sessions. Maybe you need to practice across the street from the busy park before you can practice in the park itself. That’s completely normal.
Pay attention to where your dog needs extra help. You want to pivot your expectations so your dog can win and get it right. If they can’t they will just become frustrated and tune you out.
Dog Training Regression From Inconsistent Practice: How to Get Back on Track
Dog training regression often comes from inconsistent practice, unclear cues, or jumping ahead too quickly. None of this means you’re failing.
I’ve worked with thousands of dogs and families over nearly 30 years, and I can tell you this with absolute certainty, small, steady steps lead to big, lasting changes. Your effort matters way more than perfection ever will.
If you’re feeling stuck or want more hands-on guidance with daily routines and real-life scenarios, my Manners and Life Skills, and Foundation Training Course walks you through all of this step by step. No complicated theories or confusing methods, just practical help for busy dog parents.
Dog training doesn’t have to be overwhelming. With the right approach and a little consistency, you and your dog can absolutely get there.
Troubleshooting for Common Dog Training Problems
My dog ignores treats outside.
Switch to something your dog finds incredibly exciting. Tiny pieces of cooked chicken, beef, or freeze dried dog treats often work better than regular biscuits. Also, practice farther away from distractions at first. If the park is too overwhelming, start across the street from the park. Baby steps. This is a common sign of distraction overload, not stubbornness, and it often shows up when a dog hasn’t generalized their training to outdoor environments yet.
My dog listens at home but not anywhere else.
Start over in every new place, even in your backyard. Reward every success before making things harder. Practice in one new location for several days before adding more distractions. Your dog isn’t being stubborn; they’re just learning that sit means the same thing everywhere. This is one of the most common training regression issues I see and it improves quickly with structured practice in multiple environments.
I feel frustrated because progress is slow.
I get it. I really do. Celebrate the small victories. Write down what your dog did better this week compared to last week. Sometimes taking a day off from training actually helps both of you come back with fresh energy. Be patient with yourself and your pup. Slow progress is normal when you’re learning how to stay consistent with training, and the small wins are what build lasting habits.
My dog keeps making the same mistake over and over.
Start catching the “almost right” moments. If your dog usually jumps but this time they only lifted one paw before sitting, reward that! If they normally bark like crazy but today they only woofed twice, that’s progress worth celebrating. You’re shaping the behavior you want by rewarding the steps in the right direction. When a dog repeats the same behavior, it usually means the environment is too challenging or the reward isn’t strong enough. Adjust those two things, and you’ll see improvement.
I never remember to reward the good stuff.
Leave treat jars in the rooms you use most. Even better, keep treats in your pockets all day long. Set phone reminders to practice for just one minute. Stick a note on your fridge with your dog’s name and one behavior to focus on this week. These tiny reminders help prevent training inconsistency and keep your dog’s good behaviors reinforced throughout the day.
My dog gets bored or walks away during training.
Keep sessions super short. One or two minutes max. End with play instead of food sometimes. If your dog walks away, let them. Try again later with something easier or more interesting. Training should be enjoyable for both of you. Short, fun sessions prevent boredom and keep your training routine sustainable even on busy days.
Remember, you’re not doing anything wrong. Training setbacks, distraction struggles, and consistency challenges happen to every dog parent. What matters most is keeping the process simple, rewarding, and repeatable. Every small effort adds up.
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Tonya WilhelmHi, I’m Tonya Wilhelm—a positive dog trainer, holistic pet care educator, and proud dog mom. With nearly 30 years of experience helping families raise confident, well-mannered dogs, I focus on trust-based training, enrichment, and natural wellness. I’m also a published author and content creator who shares effective, proactive ways to prevent behavior problems and help dogs thrive. You’ll often hear about my angel dogs Dexter and Stewart, who continue to inspire my work every day.
raisingyourpetsnaturally.com [...]
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TweetPinShareShareRedditShareFlipYumUnderstanding Dominance in Dogs
If someone has ever told you that your dog is being dominant, you’ve probably heard the advice to act like the pack leader or alpha. That idea has been around for decades, but it doesn’t reflect what we now know about dogs. The truth is, dominance in dogs has a very different meaning than most people think. The word dominance sounds powerful, but when we look closer at what it truly means in animal behavior, it’s not about who is in charge. It’s about context, resources, and relationships, not aggression or control. Once we understand what dominance is and isn’t, everything about dog training and communication becomes easier.
What Dominance Really Means in Dog Behavior
In animal science, dominance means priority access to a valued resource. That’s it. It’s not a personality trait, and it doesn’t mean a dog is bossy or trying to rule the house. Two dogs might take turns being the one who gets the good resting spot or the bone. It changes from moment to moment depending on what is most important to them at the time.
This is a social exchange, not a fixed hierarchy. Yet somewhere along the way, this concept was taken out of context and used to justify harsh, outdated training methods that damage trust.
The Myth of the Alpha Dog
The idea of the alpha dog came from research that started in the 1930s and 40s with a zoologist named Rudolph Schenkel. He studied a group of captive wolves that had been taken from different zoos and forced to live together in a small enclosure. Because these wolves were unrelated, under stress, and competing for limited space and food, they often fought. Schenkel interpreted this aggression as proof of a strict hierarchy with an alpha wolf at the top, controlling the others.
That interpretation was a mistake. It did not represent how wolves behave in the wild. In nature, wolf packs are families, parents and their offspring, working together cooperatively. The aggression Schenkel observed came from an artificial environment that caused conflict, not from any natural social structure.
Decades later, American biologist Dr. L. David Mech helped popularize Schenkel’s alpha idea in his 1970 book The Wolf: The Ecology and Behavior of an Endangered Species. His research at the time built on the same assumption that wolf packs were organized around dominance. But when Dr. Mech began long-term field studies observing free-living wolves, he discovered something completely different. Wild wolves live as families guided by the breeding pair, who are best described as parents, not alphas. They share responsibilities for hunting, raising pups, and protecting their territory.
Dr. Mech has spent many years correcting the public record, explaining that the term “alpha” is misleading and should be replaced with “parent.” His later research showed that wolves cooperate through family bonds rather than control or competition. This correction reshaped how scientists and trainers understand both wolves and dogs.
Dogs are not wolves, and they do not live by a rigid pack structure. They live in our homes and depend on us for safety and direction. What they need is clarity and trust, not a boss. The science has moved on, but the myth has lingered because it offers a simple, easy explanation for complex behavior.
Why We Cling to the Dominance Myth
It can be comforting to think that unwanted behavior comes from our dog trying to be dominant, because that means we can fix it by taking charge. But real behavior change takes understanding, patience, and consistency. Blaming dominance oversimplifies what’s really happening and often leads to punishment that makes behavior worse.
When a dog pulls on the leash, jumps on the counter, or growls over food, they aren’t plotting a power takeover. They’re responding to what has worked for them before or reacting out of fear or uncertainty. Understanding the why, opens the door to better solutions.
Signs of Dominance in Dogs or Signs of Stress?
Many of the things people label as dominance are actually signs of anxiety or learned behaviors. When a dog rushes through doors, it doesn’t mean they think they’re in charge. They’re excited about what’s on the other side. Teaching a wait cue and rewarding patience works better than trying to force them to stay behind you.
Growling near food or toys might look like dominance at first glance, but what’s really going on is usually something deeper. It’s often a form of resource guarding, which is rooted in fear or anxiety about losing something important. And yes, it can technically fall under the definition of dominance because it’s about priority access to a resource, but what matters most is the emotional state driving it. If your dog is guarding, they’re not challenging your role. They’re trying to keep their item. Punishing the growl shuts down their warning and builds more fear. What helps instead is changing how your dog feels about sharing. We can teach them that someone approaching their food or toy is a good thing, not a threat.
Even mounting or humping can be misunderstood. It’s often overstimulation, play, or social clumsiness, not an effort to control another dog. My golden, Theo, used to air hump when he was anxious about me leaving the house. He had separation anxiety and this was just his way of coping. It had nothing to do with dominance. Dexter, on the other hand, would sometimes grab his bed and mount it in the middle of play when he got overly excited. Again, not dominance, just a dog working through big feelings with the body he has. These moments are more about emotion than any sort of social status.
Once we see that the motivation comes from emotion, not defiance, our approach changes completely. We focus on helping the dog feel safe and teaching them what to do instead.
Dog dominance and submission explained
Submission is not a weakness. It’s a social behavior dogs use to defuse tension and avoid conflict. It often looks like puppy-like body language, curved posture, soft eyes, lowered head, or turning away. These are gestures that say, “I mean no harm.” Submission isn’t about giving up. It’s about staying safe and keeping the peace. These quiet signals help dogs navigate social situations without escalating. Submission is simply part of how dogs communicate, by helping keep interactions safe and clear without needing conflict.
Why Dominance Training Hurts More Than It Helps
Using force to establish control might seem to work at first, but it does so by creating fear. Techniques like pinning a dog down, yelling, or using shock collars suppress behavior temporarily, but they also break trust. Studies show that dogs trained through intimidation are more likely to develop aggression and anxiety.
When we punish warning signs like growling, we teach dogs that it’s not safe to communicate. That’s when bites happen without warning. Dogs learn to fear the person instead of understanding what is being asked.
What to Do Instead of Dominance Training
The most effective and humane way to change behavior is through positive reinforcement and management. Instead of trying to be the alpha, become a trusted guide. Provide structure, meet your dog’s daily needs, and teach them that good choices earn rewards.
This means managing your dog’s environment to set them up for success, reinforcing relaxed and polite behavior, and helping them feel secure and understood. Over time, trust grows and behavior improves because your dog wants to cooperate, not because they’re afraid.
Building Trust and Leadership the Right Way
Real leadership isn’t about control. It’s about guidance. We can teach impulse control and respect without fear. For example, instead of demanding a dog wait at the food bowl because we’re the boss, we can teach them to sit and wait patiently, then reward that behavior with their meal. That’s not dominance; that’s communication.
A strong relationship comes from predictability, patience, and positive training. When dogs know what to expect and feel safe with us, they naturally look to us for direction.
The True Alpha in the Relationship
If we redefine alpha to mean patient, kind, and consistent guidance, that’s something worth striving for. Our dogs don’t need us to dominate them. They need us to teach, to listen, and to help them navigate a world that can sometimes be confusing. When we let go of dominance myths and focus on building connection, we not only change behavior, we change how our dogs feel about us.
Bringing It All Together
Dominance isn’t a personality trait or a training goal. It’s just a small moment between dogs that’s been misunderstood for decades. When we replace control-based methods with patience, positive reinforcement, and empathy, we raise confident, cooperative companions who want to work with us.
If you’ve been told your dog is dominant, I hope this gives you a new way to look at things. Most dogs aren’t trying to be in charge, they’re trying to feel secure and connected.
Ready to Build Confidence and Connection?
If this topic resonates with you, I invite you to join me inside the Manners, Life Skills, and Foundation Training Course. It’s a positive, relationship-based online course designed to help you and your dog learn step by step at your own pace. Together, we can build a plan that helps both of you feel more confident and connected.
https://royalpupstrainingandwellbeing.com/
https://avsab.org/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/Dominance_Position_Statement_download-10-3-14.pdf
https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC7743949
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0167587717301241
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S1558787817300357
https://www.patriciamcconnell.com/theotherendoftheleash/confrontational-techniques-elicit-aggression/
https://davemech.org/wolf-news-and-information/schenkels-classic-wolf-behavior-study-available-in-english/
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Tonya WilhelmHi, I’m Tonya Wilhelm—a positive dog trainer, holistic pet care educator, and proud dog mom. With nearly 30 years of experience helping families raise confident, well-mannered dogs, I focus on trust-based training, enrichment, and natural wellness. I’m also a published author and content creator who shares effective, proactive ways to prevent behavior problems and help dogs thrive. You’ll often hear about my angel dogs Dexter and Stewart, who continue to inspire my work every day.
raisingyourpetsnaturally.com [...]
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TweetPinShareShareRedditShareFlipYumDog Training Games That Builds Your Dog’s Impulse Control
It is a fantastic idea to incorporate dog training games into your dog’s play and training routine because they are a fun, engaging way to strengthen your bond and improve your dog’s listening skills. Dog training games are an excellent way to teach your dog impulse control, and are a great way to teach your dog to listen even when they might otherwise be distracted. If you are looking for fun dog training games to improve your dog’s impulse control and listening around distractions, all while strengthening your bond, keep reading.
What is impulse control in dogs?
Impulse control in dogs is simply your dog’s ability to stop or wait before acting on a natural urge, like rushing a door, barking at a passing dog, grabbing a dropped treat, or chasing a moving object. I like to think of it as a dog that can “think” not just react. It is not about dominance or forcing your dog to not do something, it is about self-regulation, which is a key component of emotional maturity. A dog with good impulse control can hear the doorbell ring and not go out of their mind. If you ask them to do something, they can focus on you vs the desire to rush the door. This skill is the foundation in anything you want to teach your dog. They need to be able to think and process, not just react.
Why teaching dog impulse control games is important
Teaching your dog impulse control through fun dog training games is crucial because it gives your dog the mental tools to handle life’s most exciting and stressful situations safely and calmly. A dog that lacks impulse control can be overwhelming and sometimes dangerous, as they might react poorly to distractions.
Safety and Management: Impulse control is critical for safety. When your dog learns to pause and think instead of instantly chasing after a squirrel, you’re much less likely to find yourself at the end of the leash being pulled along for the ride. A dog who can wait before eating their food is less likely to accidentally knock the bowl out of your hand.
Better Manners: Impulse control games such as The Four on the Floor Game (which teaches them to wait for a treat) or The Darting Object Game (which teaches a dog to wait for approval), directly translate to better behavior in everyday life. Impulse control helps your dog remain settled during polite greetings, walk politely on a leash, and refrain from destructive chewing when bored.
Reduced Reactivity: Training fun impulse control games help dogs process environmental triggers. Many forms of dog reactivity (such as lunging and barking) stem from an inability to self-regulate when stimulated. By teaching your dog to pause and think instead of reacting, you give them a coping power that lowers their overall stress level in new or busy situations.
Stronger Communication and Trust: When you use fun dog training games to build your dog’s impulse control, you are creating clear and consistent boundaries in a way that feels fair and fun for both of you. Your dog learns that paying attention to your cues, instead of just reacting, always brings good things. Over time, this approach deepens the trust and communication you share with your dog.
How to get a dog to listen when distracted using fun dog training games
Teaching your dog to listen when distractions are everywhere is about building attention step by step. By using dog training games that are fun and rewarding, you help your dog learn to focus on you, even when the world around them is exciting. Start where your dog feels comfortable and gradually add more to the environment as they succeed. Each time your dog chooses to pay attention, you celebrate that moment. These positive dog training games build strong habits, so your dog naturally looks to you first, even if something tempting is nearby. The process is about creating trust and confidence so listening to you becomes your dog’s first choice.
What are some fun dog training games that teach focus
Turning dog training into play makes it easy for your dog to focus on you, even in distracting environments. When you create opportunities for your dog to practice looking to you, they learn that you are always the best option, no matter what else is going on. Begin in a setting where your dog can succeed, then gradually introduce new sights or sounds as your dog is ready. Every time your dog checks in with you, reinforce that connection with praise or a reward. As you practice, you become the most rewarding part of your dog’s world. This builds true focus, making your partnership stronger and your training much more reliable.
The SMART x 50 Dog Training Method
You can use a simple, powerful dog training game called the SMART x 50 Method to quickly improve your dog’s good behavior simply by noticing and rewarding the nice things they are already doing. The acronym of SMART stands for See, Mark, And, Reward, Training. This dog training game originated from the amazing trainer Kathy Sdao; I have had the privilege of seeing her at several training conferences over my dog training career, and her focus on rewarding choices is truly inspiring.
The principle is simple: what gets rewarded, gets repeated. By focusing on rewarding the good things, you make those desirable behaviors happen more often and without even asking for them. This approach truly shifts your entire relationship and perspective, moving away from noticing what your dog is doing wrong to celebrating their good choices.
How to play the SMART x 50 dog training game
Keep Your Rewards Handy: The first step is to grab a generous amount of low calorie, high value treats, 50 small pieces, and place them in a container that you keep in a central location in your home, well out of your dog’s reach. Toss ½ of them in your pocket. Since you will be rewarding often, it is important that the treats are tiny, yet still tempting enough that your dog actually wants to work for them. Having rewards ready and accessible means you are always prepared to reward your dog when the opportunity arises.
Actively See the Good: Your goal is to actively look for times when your dog is doing something you love without being asked. This is where the acronym SMART comes in: See, Mark, And, Reward, Training. You are actively looking for instances of your dog being present and polite. Maybe your dog is lying quietly by your feet while you work, sitting politely instead of jumping up when you approach, or settling on their mat on their own.
Mark and Reward 50 Times a Day: The instant you see your dog doing one of those wonderful behaviors, mark it with your praise word like “Yes!” and immediately deliver a treat. You want your dog to connect that specific good choice they just made with the fantastic reward they received. You repeat this whole process at least 50 times a day, hence, SMART x 50! When you consistently reward behaviors you like, such as lying down, you will naturally see your dog choose to settle and relax more often throughout the day.
Four on the Floor Game: Building Impulse Control
This game teaches your dog that if they wait politely and keep their four feet on the floor, the reward will come to them, whether it is a treat, a favorite toy, or their entire food bowl. The Four on the Floor Game is a powerful way to build self control for the pushy behaviors that naturally arise from excitement, and it works great because it sets a clear rule using only positive methods.
Start with a Treat: Hold a small treat in your open hand and extend it slightly towards your dog’s side of his head, just out of their reach. If your dog gets excited and jumps up for the treat, quickly snatch your hand away and hold it close to your chest. Jumping up removes the reward.
Wait for The Four on the Floor: Wait for your dog to stop trying to get the treat and offer any moment of polite behavior, like planting all four feet on the floor or sitting. The instant they refrain from jumping, say your praise word like “Yes!” and immediately give them the treat. By rewarding only when all four paws are on the floor, you teach them that quiet waiting is the only way to get the good thing.
Toys and Food Bowls: Once your dog is successful with a small treat, you can increase the challenge with a favorite toy. Do the same thing you did earlier, this time with a toy. If they jump up for it, quickly pull it into your chest. Wait for your dog to stop jumping, then praise and give them the toy to play with. You can apply this same principle to their regular food bowl, teaching them to sit or stand quietly before you set the bowl down. This consistency teaches your dog that asking politely is the only way to get the things they want.
The Darting Object Game
This game is a powerful way to teach your dog to pause and practice self-control around moving objects, like a squirrel or a favorite toy. Instead of chasing right away, your dog learns to wait for your cue before going after something exciting. This skill builds patience, helps your dog think before acting, and makes it much easier for you to manage strong distractions in daily life.
To play, you will need a flirt pole, which is simply a long handle with a toy attached by a sturdy cord. Make sure you play in a safe, fenced area, or inside on carpet or a rubber mat.
Start by telling your dog to, “get it” in an exciting manner. Then, make the toy extra interesting by pulling and flipping the toy along the ground. Let your dog chase and play for a few seconds, building excitement and motivation. Once your dog is fully engaged, quickly stop the movement and lift the toy up out of reach. Quietly wait and watch for your dog to pause, back up, or look to you for guidance. The moment your dog shows any sign of self-control, such as waiting patiently or glancing your way, calmly praise and then immediately give your release cue, “get it.” Allow your dog to chase the toy again as the reward.
Repeat this sequence several times. Your dog will start to understand that holding back and waiting for your cue is what brings the fun. Over time, your dog’s ability to pause and focus will become much stronger, and you’ll have a more thoughtful and attentive partner, even in the face of exciting distractions.
Loose leash walking games
Loose leash walking games are one of the best ways to teach your dog to walk politely on a leash without pulling. It builds connections with you on walks, even when distractions pop up. By turning your walk into a game, you help your dog see you as the center of the action. These loose leash walking games keep your dog focused, make every outing more enjoyable, and help prevent your dog from pulling before it starts. With a little practice, loose leash walking becomes something both you and your dog look forward to every day.
Connect the dots dog training game
The Connect the Dots Dog Training Game, adapted from the work of Leslie McDevitt, is a powerful loose leash walking game idea that uses a structured, predictable pattern to build focus. This game is wonderful because the predictability and rewarding nature of the pattern help your dog feel more settled, encouraging them to look to you for information and rewards, which is the foundation of a relaxed walk.
Setup the Dots: Place four “dots” (you can use small towels, mats, or even coasters) in a square or diamond shape about two feet apart in a quiet room or backyard.
Start by standing with your dog at the first dot. Wait quietly until your dog glances at you or checks in. The moment you have their attention, calmly praise and place the treat on the dot for your dog.
Now move together to the next dot. As you walk, reward your dog for staying near you and keeping the leash loose. When you arrive at the new dot, pause again and wait for your dog to check in. When he does, mark and place the treat on the dot. Each time your dog looks at you, you are showing them that paying attention is always worth it.
Continue connecting each dot this way. The game only needs to last a few minutes. Short and upbeat sessions help your dog stay excited and focused. As your dog gets better, you can play in new places, add small distractions, change the pattern and distance of the dots to keep things interesting.
The real benefit of this game is that your dog begins to see you as their guide, making walks smoother and much more enjoyable for both of you. With regular practice, your dog learns that following your lead is always the best choice.
Dog scent training games
Dog scent training games are crucial for mental enrichment because they allow your dog to use their most powerful sense to solve a problem. Using their nose is one of the most satisfying and confidence building activities you can share with your dog.
Treats in the Boxes Game
To start, gather a few small boxes or containers and some tiny treats. Place the boxes on the floor and let your dog watch as you drop a treat into one of the boxes. Use your cue, like “find it” or “sniffy sniff,” and encourage your dog to search. Celebrate each time your dog finds the treat by tossing in an extra treat.
As your dog gets more comfortable, use deeper or taller boxes, or spread them out around the room. When your dog is ready for a challenge, have them wait in another room while you hide treats in just one or two boxes. Bring your dog back in and ask them to find it. Notice how their nose starts working as they figure out where the treats are hidden.
If your dog is a little nervous at first, use shallow boxes or even a paper plate until they get the idea. This game is a fun and simple way to build confidence, encourage problem solving, and help your dog focus, all while letting them do what they love most, using their nose.
Agility games for dogs
You don’t need fancy equipment to practice agility games for dogs inside your home! Setting up a small indoor course is a fantastic dog brain training game idea that builds confidence and coordination without the physical stress of high speed running or jumping.
Indoor Dog Agility Course Ideas
To get started, gather some simple household items like pots, pans, pillows, broomsticks, or even a few books. Make sure everything you use is safe and secure, and always choose items that will not hurt your dog if they bump or step on them. Safety comes first. If you set up something for your dog to jump over, use lightweight objects that will fall away easily.
Invite your dog to try different actions at their own pace. Ask your dog to step over a broomstick, climb onto a sturdy pillow, or weave around a few books lined up on the floor. Mix in cues your dog already knows, like sit, down, stand, or spin. Cheer them on and give treats for trying new things. If your dog hesitates, help them out with gentle encouragement and let them build confidence step by step.
Every time you create a simple at home dog agility course, you are turning playtime into a focus-building game. By encouraging your dog to watch for your cues, try new movements, and solve little challenges, you are teaching them to pay attention to you in a way that feels natural and fun. Agility games like these are a wonderful way to help your dog develop sharper focus, build confidence, and stay engaged with you, all while having a great time together.
These dog training games are all about building a stronger, more connected relationship with your dog while making learning fun and exciting. You can totally do this! You have everything you need to start engaging your dog’s brilliant mind today.
If you ever wish you had a place to connect with others who truly understand the ups and downs of dog training, I would love to invite you to my Patreon group. You will find encouragement, answers to your questions, and fresh inspiration for every stage of your journey. Most of all, I want you to feel truly supported as you work on building a deeper connection and focus with your dog. When you join, you have me in your corner every step of the way, cheering you on and helping you find success. https://www.patreon.com/c/raisingyourpetsnaturally
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Tonya WilhelmHi, I’m Tonya Wilhelm—a positive dog trainer, holistic pet care educator, and proud dog mom. With nearly 30 years of experience helping families raise confident, well-mannered dogs, I focus on trust-based training, enrichment, and natural wellness. I’m also a published author and content creator who shares effective, proactive ways to prevent behavior problems and help dogs thrive. You’ll often hear about my angel dogs Dexter and Stewart, who continue to inspire my work every day.
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I have found that in order for New Year’s Resolutions to stick is to make them very specific. “Working on weight loss and healthy eating” is very vague. Set a specific target, as in “I will weight “x” by “date”. I will eat “x” servings of fresh fruit and veggies per day. I will eat no more than “x” unhealthy items per day. Much easier to stick with. Just a thought.
Thanks, Judy! I do have weight loss goal/date. 🙂 Missed it in 2016. 🙁 I think you’re right about having more of a food plan. That might be better for me since eating fresh is so hard for me. Maybe if I force myself to eat those things I will start to enjoy them more and even feel satisfied. Thanks for the tips!
Have a great new year!
I am so impressed with all you hope to have in store for yourself in 2017! I like the thought of not giving up all you had wanted in 2016 and letting it carry into 2017. Life happens and the goal to just keep striving is the best attitude. My only hope is that you succeed in moving yourself up more to the forefront and not leave yourself at the bottom. Your family human and furry and your friends who care about you..want you to be happy and healthy..not perfect. Give to yourself more often so you can give to others as you choose in a happier state. Putting your family high up in priorities is so important and its admirable that you do. Some have lost sight of this. On the food front, eating healthy as been a challenge for me, I did not meet my goals..at all. I know my body has suffered and most likely I’ve had more migraines as a result. One thing that helps and I hope to utilize more, is to look for uncooked but prepared foods. Like meats and veggies prepackaged together..minus all the extra chunk. I am also going to try harder to have two crock pots going for freezing meals, one for pups and one tweaked more appetizing for humans. I actually love cooking so I guess that motivation and time is lacking..or more accurately time management. Your comment on being organized and liking drawers/containers and such made me laugh..same..same here. I hope 2017 brings you closer to your dream! The beach is waiting..you will get there. 🙂
Thanks, Barbara. That is very kind of you. I really am hoping to take care of myself this year. Reminds me of the old Seinfeld episode, The Summer of George. lol
Long ago I forgo making any resolutions, at least I don’t call it that anymore. Instead I focus on what I would like to do and accomplish in the upcoming year, that way it’s not as overwhelming.
Professionally I want to focus on my blog – refining it and planning out my posts in advance.
That is a great focus! Good luck.
My hardest job is setting aside time just to….be. With nothing else going on. When you work for yourself, and are always “on” with never ending projects, there’s no quitting time. So I’m struggling to get better about that.
Thanks, Amy. Me too!
You seem like you have your goals figured out with a plan on how you will achieve them. I think that is a really big deciding factor if you’ll actually be able to stick to them. Good luck to you, I’m inspired to set my own!
Thanks. I appreciate that. 🙂
Oh my gosh, you and I have SO much in common! This year I marked 16 months of a serious lifestyle change, re-branding of my blog (still working on that) and the struggle to pay more quality attention to myself is ever-present. We are twinsies! 😀 You go!!! You can kick butt this year! It sounds like you have already come so far!
Hahaha Thanks, Shannon! I’m glad I’m not the only one with these struggles. You go too!
Hey – I think you are doing fantastic! Good golly, you’re doing a lot and often times it’s when we are busy ‘doing’ that it’s harder for us to practice self-care. But I hear you – exercising and losing weight are tough, maybe if we focused on health (like you asked yourself about “would you feed this to Dexter”). We often laugh when we nibble on Cheetos, admitting that the dogs eat better than us. Hey, maybe we need to start a healthy eating pet blogger support group!! I’m right there with you!
Hahaha Oh, I think you might be on to something Rebecca!
It’s a little more difficult for me to focus on resolutions this year since I found out I was taking an early retirement (unexpected).
I wish you the best in 2017. Being open for new things would be a great one for you! 🙂
I have had a hard time thinking of resolutions for this year. 2016 was a great year for my blog! I know I need to set some goals to help 2017 to be just as good, or hopefully better!
Congratulations on a great 2016~ Better. 🙂
Those sound like wonderful New Year’s Resolutions! I have found that my own resolutions don’t last that long, so now I’m just try to make better adjustments. Unfortunately, I haven’t been very successful with some of them, especially exercising and eating healthy. I bought some new cookbooks and I hope that will make a big difference.
Thanks for sharing Beth. I hope those cookbooks help. I’m not sure about recipes for me, that’s my downside, I just tend to wing it, hence not such a tasty meal. I need to be better!
You’ve had so much success, that’s wonderful! You tackled a huge project in 2016, that alone is a giant goal. I like to tell myself to set goals but to be Flexible, that way I’m not too disappointed when I go off track with a new idea or opportunity. Flexibility is important. I’m finalizing my goals for 2017 right now, I’m hoping for a successful year!
Love & Biscuits,
Dogs Luv Us and We Luv Them
Thanks, Cathy. I appreciate your comments and support. I try to go with the flow, and I do, but my type A kicks in….haha
We aim to stay healthy and organised. We have goals for the blog and ourselves – here’s to a good 2017.
Thanks! 2017 is going to be great, I can feel it!
I’m still working on blog goals for the year but I have some personal ones established so far.
That’s great! I wish you and Mr. N a great year.
Those look like great goals, and you seem to be off to a great start. Well done! I’m working on daily goals and organization. I plan to celebrate each accomplishment and not beat myself on anything that will be carried over to the next day.
Thanks, Sadie. One of my goals is to have daily goals, so I can feel like I’ve done something. 🙂
Good luck on your goals! We have several goals we wish to accomplish as well. Healthy eating is definitely one of them!
Thanks. Good luck to you Kia!
Best thing I ever did was focus on nutrition. About 7-8 years ago I slowly dropped sugar, wheat, refined and processed foods and so on … it’s 70% of any weight loss process versus exercise that counts for the remaining 30%. Feel so good…. but it was a HUGE lifestyle change. That is for sure. YOU GOT THIS!
Thanks, Sonja. I’m so scared about trying to drop sugar. I’m such a sugar junkie. Little steps, little steps.
I have to ask myself the same question when I’m about to eat something – I’m picky when it comes to what my dogs eat, but I forget to eat fresh foods myself!
We have a lot in common!
New year resolutions we make to break them but some we need to follow through for our own benefit
Interesting